Solution-based Thinking
For this week “Self-Development teachings” I was listening to a podcast hosted by Dean Graziosi, “Millionaire Success Habits”. He always shares quick 10 minutes tips on how to change your mindset to create more focus in life and succeed.
In this episode, he starts with a question “How Can You Live The Life You Desire?”. It is an interesting and maybe complicated question, but the answer is very simple.
He talks about how much emphases people put in the pain, trying to find who’s fault it is, what hurts and how terrible they feel about something. We are totally allowed to feel sad, the victim and unjustified, but we cannot let this pain bring us down. People tend to put so much energy going backwards that stops them seeing the new opportunities in front of them. It is when your past starts to be dragged into your future.
Successful people change the way they think. They understand that your past is there for research and development. They accept problems. Problems are an important part of life, and it is inevitable to avoid them. Without problems you are not playing the game of life. You are playing small. If you want a small life, you will avoid all situations in which you are outside your comfort zone.
How to change the way you think?
Where to start?
You can spend so much time and money trying to figure out who, why and how something happened. The only thing it does is to create uncomfortable situations, revenge, anger. It doesn’t fix anything. You can blame anything and anyone you want, but the problem will still be there.
Start thinking like this: It happened. What can I learn from it? And how do I immediately change that energy and focus on fixing it?
5 solutions rules:
Dean Graziosi gives an example of something he does with his kids, and I thought it can be applied to any situation in life. He allows 30 minutes of electronics a day and every time he always has the same situation in which his kids start to get mad at him after the 30 minutes has passed. He can punish them and make them feel angry when they can no longer play with video games, but instead, he sits with them and ask them to write down 5 solutions or alternatives they can do instead of being mad that they cannot play video games anymore. Play with Legos, go outside, read a book… He let them find 5 ways to make the situation better, find other alternatives, and to not repeat the same behavior.
How can you focus on a better outcome?
Self-analysis is very important in this process. Where in your life are you still looking backwards? Where in your life are you still the victim? Is it really helping you to move on?
“Success is when you go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm”.
Start programming your mind in stop blaming people or things, just go and do it. When things go wrong, you immediately think about how to fix it.